Tom Selleck and the art of lazy acting

Have you seen BLUE BLOODS starring Tom Selleck?   This is a new one hour police drama on CBS created by a couple of SOPRANOS scribes.   Just the type of show I never watch unless other people tell me it's great and I have to watch it. (meaning I'll probably never see the Jim Belushi lawyer show.)

But I saw that BLUE BLOODS got big numbers on Friday night.   The odds of any show doing really well on Friday nights are the same as being hit by a meteor just moments after winning the lottery.  Clearly the attraction was Tom Selleck.

So when it was rerun last night (Saturday is now the networks' dumping ground) I checked it out.

I guess when audiences like you they just like you.  Because I have never seen an actor phone it in as much as Selleck did in this.   He did NOTHING.  In the few scenes he's in he never moves. Worse than NEWHART when Bob used to just stand at the front desk and let everyone else just come in and out. 

These were Tom’s scenes:

He’s at a podium (never moves).
He’s standing with his family (never moves).
He’s at the window of his office (never moves).
He’s at his desk making a call (never moves).
He’s conducting a press conference (never moves).
He’s at the kitchen sink (never moves).
He’s sitting at the dining room table (never moves).
He’s fishing off a pier (never moves).

There’s one scene where he opens a cab door for a woman and leans in to give her a quick kiss. I imagine they used a stunt double.

As for dialogue, he delivers every line the exact same way – as if he’s constipated.

And yet America just loves this guy. I was a fan in other things. But in MAGNUM P.I. he had actual expressions and walked.

I see no reason to watch future episodes of BLUE BLOODS. Why bother when I can just scan the stills?

But it’s a real lesson in television programming. There are just some actors people love to watch, regardless.

If only Tom Selleck was in LONE STAR or FRIDAY NIGHT LIGHTS.